Dating & Sex, Life

How To Keep The Fire Burnin’ In Your Long Term Relationship

So you and your partner have phased out of the honeymoon stage, but aren’t quite at the planning for marriage and babies point. You’re officially languishing in the long term relationship area. Your mum may be asking for a save the date card or pestering you for those grandkids, but really you’re still wanting to focus on you and maintaining happiness and balance in your relationship. It can be challenging to keep the spark alive in an ever-evolving long term relationship, so here’s a few tips to keep the romance alive.

#1 Mingle In Activities That Don’t Involve Your Lover

Of course it’s important to share experiences with your significant other, but it doesn’t mean you have to do everything together. It might be an exercise class, a book club, or designated Friday drinks with your mates. Allow yourself to have a space where you’re still interacting with people but it is someone other than your partner. Giving yourself space from one another every once is a while is healthy for your relationship and means you’ll actually have time to miss each other.

#2 Me Time

You’re about a year down the track and you have officially realised you’re deep in the long term relationship bubble. You still make time for your mates, but realise that the company of another person now consumes your once designated alone time. Now that’s all well and good but totally unsustainable. Learn to do things apart, learn to do things alone again. Whether that is some solo Netflix and chill, a beach walk or even a shopping trip, make the time for it. Your significant other doesn’t have to tag along on every endeavour, and you can always share your series spoilers to them later.

#3 Let’s Get It On

Sex, have it but don’t make it unsexy and put in in your calendar as “every Sunday night is business class”. There could be no bigger turn-off than diarised sex. Instead let it come naturally but still do it. If you’re having trouble finding the spark, then try new things. There’s a little unknown book called the Kuma Sutra, Google it. And remember, your sex life isn’t dwindling just cause you don’t jump on each other as much as you used to. It’s just natural progression.

#4 Date Nights

Still make time for quality time, still do dates. There is nothing more boring that falling into a routine of “Eat, Netflix, Sleep, Repeat” (not as riveting as the Ibiza mantra). Make sure that every now and then you go out and spend some couple time. Whether it be a dinner date at the local Thai restaurant or even an arvo trip to the beach, just do something outside of the everyday routine.

#5 Make Exciting Plans

There’s nothing more important in life than having things to look forward to. Even nicer to have things to look forward to with your partner. If you two are in it for the long haul, give yourselves some future goals. Now that’s not to say you have to plan how many kids you’re having and what their names will be, but you know plan a holiday. Picture six months down the road and envision yourselves on the beaches of Mexico. Or maybe think about the prospect of moving in together in the next (lol jks, this is Australia, you might need a little longer to plan for that).

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A proud Queenslander currently living in Sydney. During the week, I try to attend all the new bars in Sydney and the different events in the city. On weekends I can be found chasing the sun and exploring the outdoors across New South Wales. My favourite things are comic book movies, waterfall jumps and long walks to the bar.

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