in Entertainment, TV & Film

RECAP: All The Best Twitter Reactions To The First Bachelor In Paradise Episode

Timm is actually great and I wish it hadn’t taken me this long to see it.

It’s here! It’s finally here! I know it’s literally only been a few months since our last Bachie content but  coronavirus has made this year feel like three decades so honestly, I welcome the spiral into trash TV. Bachelor in Paradise is just the right amount of trashy for me to engross myself in it and pretend the apocalypse isn’t in full swing, so let’s get to it.

Okay but I am LIVING for Osher gassing up Abbie. She copped so much shit for her time on Bachie and she deserves Bachie Jesus’ protection and endorsement. Especially because most of this episode was boring AF and Abbie’s constant commentary was prob the only reason I didn’t tune out after the first 10 min. I gotta say, I expected more from Bachelor in Paradise, because it only got interesting in the second half of the episode.

Okay, but REAL TALK. Cass/Ciarrin was SO OUT OF NOWHERE.

Cass was a bit of a nobody in Matt’s season, so watching her walk into Bachelor in Paradise and suddenly snag the hottest bad boy of the day while previously being treated as a literal pixie child was SUCH A TWIST.

Except for, you know, the fact that she was constantly slut-shaming Abbie along with everyone else. Sigh. It was honestly so unnecessary. Hello internalised misogyny, I see we are not done with you yet.

Then Ciarran decides to hit up Abbie anyway since he doesn’t get a smooch from Cass… and now, while I am also absolutely here for Abbie getting what she wants, it’s defo a bit yikes. But also everyone is literally on this island to smash so maybe not.

Anyway, LET’S TALK ABOUT TIMM. I didn’t actually watch the whole Angie season (just enough to keep my media job oops), so I did not initially get the hype around himm (hehe) when I watched him behave like an actual 8 year old as he hid from Abbie behind couches and then spooked her.

Like, is this Bachie in Paradise or  Play School? BUT THEN HE TURNS OUT TO BE SUPER SMART AND ADORABLE, telling people to calm down because it’s only the first day (the only sane thing said this entire episode), and then CHOOSING BRITTNEY DESPITE NOT BEING INTO HER SO SHE CAN HAVE A DATE.

Also this recap basically converted me:

The Brits are honestly the only two girls not getting involved in drama so far in this season of Bachelor in Paradise, gassing themselves up and having a good time, and for that they are my faves. Watching Brit refuse to be pit against her co-date and calling her a “beautiful soul” was SO SWEET.

Also @ Brittney, I WANT TO HERE ABOUT HOW YOU FOUND THE DEAD BODY EVEN IF TIMM DOESN’T. I LOVE YOU.

For real though, WHO TF IS GLENN? And the other guy with the nice eyebrows from 84 years ago who I don’t remember the name of. Niranga though, I remember, and he is getting absolutely slept on AGAIN. Shame on you, editors.

Can we talk about how much I can’t stand Jamie? WHO TF LET HIM IN HERE.

Anyway, that’s all for today folks. Next week on Bachelor in Paradise we are going to see this Abbie/Cass drama hit the fan, watch Jamie try to give out 5 roses (???), hopefully actually hear Niranga speak and not just be token diversity hire, and meet our new surprise contestant Jess! Who, BTW, is the hottest person I have ever seen. Ok, bye.

Image Sources: Twitter, Channel 10  

abbie chatfieldbachelor in paradiseCiarranJamie DoranNiranga

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