Dating Around: How To Figure Out What You Want And How To Get It



Even though the dating scene can be scary or intimidating these days, if you take the time to know what you really want in a partner, and what you offer, it can be life-changing. The old adage, “you can’t love anyone else until you love yourself”, is still appropriate today. If you are not happy with who you are and your current situation in life, adding someone new will almost always spell disaster for both parties.


To ensure you find the love of your life, journalling, recording your thoughts, tracking your emotions and feelings and keeping a 2023 diary can be a very useful approach. Having all of this information for easy reference can be very useful in helping you figure out exactly what it is that you want from your next relationship. Dating is a very different scene compared to just a decade or two ago. If you are recently single or just haven’t had a lot of luck finding that special someone, don’t give up. With the right approach and mindset, there’s no reason that you can’t find the perfect person for you. Dating may seem weird and different now, but falling in love is the same as it has always been.


Let’s take a look at some tips to help you to figure out what you want and how to get it when it comes to relationships.


Do a Personal Inventory


With the understanding that working on being happy is going to lead to better and healthier relationships, it is time to give yourself the one over. Whether you physically write this out on a marker board, do up a document on your computer, or just keep it in your head, it is an absolutely essential start to this process.


Set aside the time to figure out what you like about your life, what you dislike, and what could use some work. When coming up with this inventory, it must be from a truly honest standpoint, or it will not be effective. This list is not being done to point out or highlight your weaknesses and poor choices. It is being made to empower you, to lay out your uniqueness, critique it, and ultimately make it strong and whole.


Put Yourself Out There


Once you are confident in yourself and your life situation, you will stand a much better chance of finding love. When this time comes, it is important that you also know what you are looking for in a partner. With online dating and apps, physical characteristics are front and centre, and an easy yes or no. Compatibility, on the other hand, is going to take a bit more of a detailed approach.


Start by making a complete profile on your dating app of choice. This should include photographs, not selfies you took in the bathroom mirror. Take this seriously, you need to show off all of your good points. Make sure to add your interests, hobbies, and other important information, especially those that are dearest to you. A lazy or incomplete profile is going to give you a major disadvantage, so be sure to put the work in.


Must Haves and Must Nots


If you have gotten to the point where you have a fully stocked profile, ensuring not to give away everything up front, you must start the filtering process. As an individual, you need to know what things are red flags, and which are green flags, for you. It doesn’t hurt to do up a quick reference list, as a lot of apps allow you to filter matches very specifically. This is going to save you time, headaches, and disappointment in the long run.


While you obviously can’t judge a book by its cover, dating apps have the basic characters and plot laid out in old-person print. Start filtering, and trying to match with potential dates, remembering that Rome wasn’t built in a day. With patience and persistence, the right match is out there for everyone, you just need to know what you are looking for and go for it.


The Right One is Out There, You Just Need To Find Them 


Love and dating can take you from being on top of the world to soul-crushing depression, and everything else in between. The thing to keep in mind, especially when it veers down that dark road, is that there truly are plenty of fish in the sea. Make sure you are true to yourself, honest with your intentions, and put in the work, and you can be sure that your efforts when it comes to dating will be nothing short of successful. Just because some things have changed, doesn’t mean that we can’t find loving, long-term relationships that bring real meaning and value to your life and make you happier than you ever thought possible moving forward.