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Dating & Sex 0

It’s Not You – The Sound of Music

By Dominique Margaret · On 17 June, 2015

Sitting on the bus on my way to work one morning, earphones in, looking at the world as I pass it by. Still not quite totally awake, I turn the volume up as my favourite song comes on and rest my head against the window.

Bordering on the verge of dreams, I listen to the song playing into my ears, focussing only on the instruments and ignoring the vocals. This exercise got me thinking. Instrumental versions of songs sound just as beautiful the song it self, same for the vocals in acapella style.

Ever been in a relationship that has ended and been left wondering who you became or struggling to grasp who you now are? I had the idea of this article in the back of my mind for close to six months, but couldn’t think of how I would write it, until this frosty cold June morning I commuted to work.

A relationship is like a song.

Some a passing phase, others remind you of crazy European Summers gone by, certain ones make you cringe and then there are the once in a life time classics. Songs can have the same emotional effect on a person as a relationship, and when you break down the components of a track you see the two are very alike.

Stay with me here…

I’ve made some terrible remixes, mismatched beats and failed to get the bass right.

Picture your life as a sheet of lyrics with no instruments. It’s raw, vulnerable and pure. Who you are, your goals, your dreams and fears all scribbled down onto one page. You’ve got nothing to hide behind but the words that make up you as a person.

This is the acapella version of my favourite song. Just like this version, it’s clear just how powerful you are when you stand alone…without instruments. You don’t always need to accompany music and one thing I’ve learnt in the past few years is to work on being happy with your lyrics instead of trying to hide behind music, or worse, trying to change them to fit to fit someone else’s tune.

I’m a hopeless romantic and just simply love love. The whole world revolves around finding the perfect song to sing my lyrics to, and in the past I’ve made some terrible remixes, mismatched beats and failed to get the bass right. We’ve all come across a tune on the radio that’s made us wonder WHY someone would destroy a great song with a terrible remix (cough Pitbull cough).

I don’t know if I’m the only person guilty of doing this, but at the end of a very long relationship of mine, I realised how much I didn’t exist as my own person and rather tried really hard to commit my whole self to the relationship rather than being a strong independent component which complemented my partner, not moulded into him.

His hobbies became mine, his friends mine by default, our free time spent together doing stuff either of us didn’t really want to do because we thought we “had” to. Our song, which once seemed a timeless ballad, started to turn into a one hit wonder, and got to the point where listening to it wasn’t fun anymore.

We decided to skip tracks, he took his music, I walked away with a page of jumbled up lyrics, making little sense.

It wasn’t until the music stopped, did I realise I had turned the volume down on my own song and tried to be more instrumental. I lost sight of the lyrics and had forgotten all the words.

For those growing tired of their current song, take a step back, close your eyes and just listen. Is the music too loud and overbearing, muffling out the words? Or contrastingly, is it too quiet and the lyrics aren’t supported – leaving the track weak?

You may be wondering what my point is; sure she’s going on about instruments and words big deal! The point I’m trying to get across is, it’s so easy for two people to become almost so enthralled with each other, they form one, rather than remaining two separate identities.

If you take anything away from reading this, it’s to remember that you should always make sure you remember your lyrics, who you are, what you stand for. If your music doesn’t support that, your partner doesn’t support you.

Although there’s no better feeling than finding the perfect music to accompany your lyrics, the key word is accompany.

When the two come together, there’s no doubt it’s not magic, but never turn down your volume for anyone.

Img Source: Lester Cohen/WireImage

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Dominique Margaret

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