Breaking up with a partner absolutely sucks. There is no easy way to tell someone that you no longer want them in your life. But do you know what else really sucks? Ending a friendship.
Being on the receiving end of a friendship breakup is undoubtedly painful, but it is equally as hard to stand up and tell a mate that they can no longer be friends with you. Whatever the reason is, it is so much better to have a conversation with your friend and discuss the breakup, than to slowly decline every offer to hang out, until they get the picture. Honesty is best for both parties and ghosting someone, whether it be a new flirt, partner or friend is just an all-round shitty thing to do. So here’s a definitive guide to breaking up with your best friend.
First, Thoroughly Assess The Situation
You can’t just go around ending friendships willy-nilly. If the friendship is toxic (which, luckily for you, we have a guide to helping you assess if a friendship has become toxic) then it is fair to decide to end that relationship. You must be certain that this person is bad for your mental health and that you no longer want them in your life, because friendship breakups are often irreversible.
Ask Them To Meet You In Person
Much like a relationship breakup, this stuff should be done in person. It is completely insincere to end a friendship over text, phone call (or Snapchat if you’re really stooping that low)…You need to send your friend a message and ask to meet them for coffee or for a drive, or even ask if you can come to their house. You also don’t want to blindsight them, so don’t make it sound like you just want to hang out. Send a text that says something like, “Hey, I need to speak with you about something that is on my mind. I would appreciate if we could meet in person.”
Plan The Conversation Ahead Of Time
You need to figure out exactly what you want to say and the reasons that you’re giving them for ending the friendship before you meet them. If this is a one sided friendship breakup, chances are, they may try to apologise and essentially ‘win you back.’ But if you have your points all figured out, you can get in there, say what you need to say and get out.
Make It About You
Telling the person that they’re an evil, psychopathic meanie-pants is just malicious and unnecessary. You need to tell them that you are ending friendship because of reasons relating to you and you only. For example, the friendship is no longer good for your mental health, your life is moving in a different direction or you feel as though the friendship has run it’s course.
Stick To It
Just like a relationship breakup, you can’t fall back into it when your lonely or when it’s convenient for you. If you are cutting this person off, you are doing it for a reason. If they are toxic now, they will still be toxic in twelve months time. Delete, unfollow, block or do whatever you need to do to protect yourself.
Take Time To Heal
Friendship breakups freaking suck and even though this was your decision, you will probably feel weird and sad for a while. Spend time with people (or dogs) who make you feel happy and uplift you. Or if you want to take a day to watch a sad movie and cry into your ice-cream, that’s totally acceptable too.
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