Being in a long term relationship is great. You can be truly comfortable with the person you love. You have unlimited access to smooches and snuggles. And most importantly, you pretty much have sex on tap.
But with that, it can be all too easy to fall into a place where you no longer have to work to get the lovin’ you want. You don’t have to try too hard anymore. No longer do you have to look your best and impress your lover. By this time they’ve seen you at your best and your worst and they’ve probably bonked you at both.
Just because you love each other, doesn’t mean you should stop trying. If you feel like you’ve settled into too comfortable a routine at the sacrifice of your sex life, it can be hard to get back into the swing of things. But we’ve got a couple tips that will help you reignite the fire in your loins and make you two want to jump each other, just like you did when you first started dating.
Get dressed up
If you guys live together, chances are they mostly see you in work and house clothes. When you feel like you don’t have to impress each other any more, chances are you’re not going on date nights as fancy as you used to. You probably have your favourite pub that does and excellent parma special. But putting in some effort for a nice night out is sure to put the oomph back in your love life. If they find you attractive in trackies, then they’ll struggle to keep their hands off you when you’re looking fine.
Sext each other
Sexting. It’s such a simple thing, but it can have such an impact. No doubt you used to do it all the time when you were newly dating. Take yourself back to the time when all you could think about was bae’s booty and text them about it. Let them know you’re thinking about their body and your plans to get them nekkid later. Making them think about you like that with hours until they can have you is sure to cause some desire. Just be careful when they jump you later.
There’s nothing wrong with having a routine. You guys have probably racked up a couple hours of practice, so now you know what works. You get the best bang for your buck and you’re experts at the quickie. But just with anything else, monotony can take the spice out of sex. Mix it up every once and a while and do something different. Have a bit of role play. If you always have sex in bed, take it to the lounge/shower/kitchen/table. Introduce a toy to the bedroom. Doing something different and exciting will get your engines revving in no time.
Seduce, don’t just ask
If you find yourselves watching Netflix and then one of you is like “oi, sex?” then some of the romance has definitely died. Actually seducing your partner rather than just straight out asking for it is sure to bring some of that back. Everyone wants to feel wanted and desired, and there’s nothing better than a bit of tease. Put on your sexiest knickers. Pull a power pose. Wink and flirt and do all that good stuff you used to do. Make them want you, make them chase you and then get. It. On.
Spend some time apart
They say absence makes the heart grow fonder, and they’re right. There’s nothing like making you realise how much you love someone than having them no longer in arm’s reach. Spending the weekend, or even longer, away from each other will make you want them all the more. Trust us, after a couple of nights apart, you’ll be tearing each other’s clothes off as soon as you see each other again. And then the night after that. And the night after that. After all, you’ve got a couple nights to catch up on.
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