Relationships are hard. There’s no doubt about it. All of a sudden, you have this other person in your life like 24/7. The pressure to keep them impressed and interested can be overwhelming, especially in those early days. But what happens when you slip into the comfortable groove? Sure, reaching a point where you can be your #mostauthenticself with your partner is great. But it can also start to pique some irrational relationship angst.
What if they’re not attracted to me anymore? What if my body isn’t exciting to them anymore. Do they still think I’m interesting even though they know pretty much everything about me? What if they get bored and they start looking for something else?
Girl, you’re not alone. But you are being… a touch crazy. Here’s some ways to stop that irrational angst from ruining your relationship.
Positive self talk
Now I know this is all a bit touchy feely, but honestly, keeping yourself positive is a massive stage in allowing positivity into your life. If you spend all your time thinking about this angst and not combatting it, you’ll start to believe it. More so, you’ll start to find evidence of it where there is none. Telling yourself that these aren’t true and that they still love you can go a long way. Make yourself believe it. Remind yourself that if you’re not feeling this about them, chances are they aren’t feeling it about you either.
Spice it up
Nothing gets the fire back in a relationship like doing something new. If you’re still getting down about this, and you can’t get it out of your head, do something real and tangible to combat it. Maybe you buy some cute new underwear to surprise them with, or plan a full date night designed to restart some passion. Maybe you just get your kink on at home and do something you know they’ve fantasised about (as long as you’re comfortable. Comfort + confidence = sexiest thing ever). If you feel like you’re in a rut and it’s getting to you too much, do something to shake that up.
Communication, communication, COMMUNICATION
Now this is my biggest tip of all. Ain’t nothing like settling your restless mind than actually talking to them. All the best relationships are built on a foundation of healthy and open communication. And if you feel like there’s an issue with your confidence within that relationship, talking to them about it can help ease a multitude of angsts. Chances are, your partner will take your anxieties and put them all to rest. And you’ll immediately feel ten times better. Giving them the chance to hear why you’ve maybe been a bit distant and letting them know what’s going on in that head of yours can only help your relationship grow better and stronger. After all, no one’s a mind reader. Don’t expect your partner to be.