Life, Music & Gigs

How To Survive A Bender (And Live To Tell The Tale)

With a few benders on the cards over the next few months, we’ve done the research and come up with your how-to survival guide for you legends. For all you rookies who are planning on going for their first one, you’re in the right place. Because let’s face it, when you do something for the first time, you never know what you’re doing and the outcome is all up in the air.  There are three stages to a bender and this is how to ride that wave with poise.

#1 Pre-Bender

This is the stage or time leading up to your bender. You know big things are about to come so you’re probably riddled with excitement. Take it easy, this is a marathon, not a 100m sprint. There are a few things to take into consideration leading up to the bender, whether you’re at a festival, taking the long weekend on in full force or just having a sesh with your mates.

Eating & Hydrating

Eating before a bender lines your stomach so that you don’t have a few drinks and then end up on the floor. It’s the key to success, DJ Khaled, in this respect at least, knows what’s up. Hydrating before a bender with lots of water also makes sure that you don’t become completely dehydrated during said marathon. Hot tip: gatorades will be your best friend, and not only for their electrolyte qualities either. 

Make sure your affairs are in order

What do I mean by making sure your affairs are in order? If you’re at a festival, make sure all your valuables are safe before you start menacing about, this means phone, wallet, etc. I know I’m not alone in recalling that time I lost my phone, wallet or both that I just left in my pocket, while out adventuring. You guessed it, it then it fell out of my pocket. Rookie error. Make sure you and your mates have a meeting place coordinated amongst yourselves if you lose each other in big crowds. Ensure that you are all stocked up on the necessities such as food and water. Hey, I don’t mean to be a nag but you do want to survive right?

#2 Mid-Bender

Ok so, depending on how many days this bender is going for, there are a few things you must consider if you want to survive this bender of yours. With all your extremities and sanity intact of course. 

Keeping the natural flow

You must eat during your bender, and you must drink water during your bender. Broken record I know, but it’s a fundamental revelling mistake. Just relay that through your brain, or write it on your arm if your memory is that bad. It is so important that you do this, otherwise you will just fizzle out after the first or second day, probably the first actually. We are not machines, we need water and food to survive. Plus, festivals have some pretty sweet food options on offer so be sure to sus ’em all out. 

Conscious bystanding

Take extra care in looking after your mates during this benderous time. Take into consideration that everyone has different intake levels and may react differently to others on the bender. You may be pulling up sweet but your pal is all but legless (or vice versa), keep an eye out and be safe . No matter how fucked you are.

#3 Post-Bender

The morning after…yes, once your intoxication wears off, this is the hardest part. Coming back to reality and realising the havoc you’ve wreaked. You’ve pushed your body to its limits, and now it’s time to re-nourish that work of art.

Re-hydration

Start with re-hydrating yourself with water or even coconut water or hydralites if you want that refreshing taste in your mouth. If it pleases you head to the servo or supermarket and proudly march to buy a pack of Gatorades, own your pain. 

Get a solid feed

Eat. Eat until you are full, and even if you’re a health food fanatic, getting something greasy and unhealthy just this one time will be more satisfying that anything else right now. Think the food of your wildest dreams and then get fries as well. Deep fried goodness > salad. 

Chill out

Find your comfort. Whether that be to binge-watch Netflix eps till you fall into a long deep sleep, go for a swim, or cuddle someone special, only you know what is relaxing to you. Taking at least a little time out and letting your body recover is a struggle but push through. You made it this far, we believe in you. 

Image source: Groovin The Moo Facebook Page

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Margot (yes, like Margot Robbie, no not quite Margot Robbie) is a canine-loving, food-obsessed gal who will always volunteer to taste-test cocktails when serving behind the bar.

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