Miley and Liam’s public breakup last month had every Last Song-loving millennial questioning if love was even real anymore. Miley reverted back to twerking on Instagram, and launched straight into a new relationship with Brody Jenner’s ex-wife Kaitlynn Carter. One can only imagine the sting Liam felt seeing pics of his recent ex kissing and cuddling up to another woman. AND the sting of being told he needs to move on ‘back to the ocean,’ via chart topping hit Slide Away. Ouch.
Miley’s breakup behaviour can best be described as Insta Girl-ing… And we have all been seen or dated the Insta Girl. So with that bit of inspo, here’s a definitive list of every type of girl post breakup. And yeah, you’ve absolutely been one of them.
(Ps. if you are struggling after a breakup, here are a few tips on what not to do).
The Insta Girl
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The Insta Girl wastes no time in uploading her bikini grams post breakup. She probs also uploads photos of her getting down in the club and snapping selfies with half the male population. The Insta Girl just wants to visibly send her ex the message that she is absolutely living her best life.
The Crazy Ex-Girlfriend
The Crazy Ex-Girlfriend will definitely try to sleep with her ex’s mates. She may cut the arms off of all his suits or publicly expose how much he sucks, on social media. She will then regret her decisions and stalk his every move, concocting a scheme to win him back. Yikesss.
The Ice-Cream Eating Sad Sack
The sad sack will go off grid for a few weeks. People may think she is vacationing at a yoga retreat, but really she is living on her lounge in a pile of empty ice-cream containers, soggy tissues and self-help books.
The ‘Let’s Be Best Friends’ Ex-Girlfriend
This girl immediately wants to be best friends with her ex-boyfriend. She learns very quickly that this is not a good idea.
The Drunk Texter
The drunk texter will send her ex bf a message at 8pm, just after pre-drinks, saying that she misses him. By 10pm, she will text him to tell him that he’s a dick and she regrets ever meeting him. 11pm she’s in his bed.
The cynic becomes very sceptical of relationships and men in general. She will tell her friends to dump their boyfriends because “all men are all the same.” The cynic will blacklist rom-coms because they’re “full of lies” and also be a ball of pessimism.
The Career Gal
The career gal is a strong independent woman who don’t need no man. She’s decidedly chasing her dreams and no longer wasting her time chasing men. Chase the dream, and the guy will follow and all.
Image Sources: Facebook Miley Cyrus