Dating & Sex, Life

He Says, She Says; Long Distance Relationships

Ola and I have been in a long distance relationship for a few months now. Technicalities aside, being with someone without being with them has it’s ups and downs. However, we attempt to make it work the best we can with communication, sex(t) and dedication to one another. Despite what the critics would say, it’s worth the rollercoaster ride if you love the person. Essentially Ola is in Sydney and Sean in Melbourne.

He Says – Sean

There is no shortage of people I know who won’t hesitate in telling me exactly what they think about long-distance relationships and they rhetorically ask, “Why not find somebody closer to f*ck?” and I could. The bottom line is she’s my favourite and 700 kilometres doesn’t come close to keeping us apart for anything longer than two weeks at a time.

But to tell the truth long distance relationships are not overly complicated. Okay, I’d understand if she was living in a different country or if seeing her meant parting the red sea some real talk might be more inescapable. But in fact I think the distance does wonders for relationships both sexually and intimately.

The opportunity to leave your comfort zone to find comfort in someone else give’s a long distance relationship this romantic sense of dilemma where some kind of familiarity comes from a completely new experiences.

It shouldn’t come as a surprise to me when something I thought would be so complicated turn’s out to be so simple. Keeping mementos goes a long way. We have an unspoken rule that each time we see each other we leave something behind. I find that the next day after one of us leave, we will go on FaceTime and we are wearing each other’s clothes.

Balance is the essential ingredient along with trust, planning, promising and delivering.

Keeping an open mind is also something to throw into the pot if you smell what I’m cooking. Yes, sometimes a romantic evening with Bae turns out to be just a FaceTime call with her undivided attention but if that isn’t love, what is?

Also the opportunity to leave your comfort zone to find comfort in someone else give’s a long distance relationship this romantic sense of dilemma where some kind of familiarity comes from a completely new experiences.

She Says – Ola

I went into this originally being completely against having a long-distance relationship – look at us now. All loved up and grossly affectionate, very much unlike me.  However, I’m going to go through my list of the positives and negatives of long distance.

The first and main positive is that I only have to shave my legs every two to three weeks – oh the joys of being a woman. It’s winter – I want to be my own little Chewbacca but I can’t exactly do that when I’m around my boyfriend all the time. It also works out because I can look the best I can when I am around him and below average (which comes natural to me…) when he’s not around. He can’t judge me for my trackies and sweatshirt look if he isn’t there. Winning.

The most prominent negative is everyone questioning your relationship – nearly every second person asks me if he is sleeping with someone in Melbourne, my response is always nearly, I don’t know go check! If he is then I probably wouldn’t be hanging around! As much as this is a negative it also brings out a positive with the amount that we trust each other. We lead our own lives and we get to do our own things (another positive) whenever we want to.

As much as it isn’t the same as when we are in person – it does allow us to completely explore everything we want from one another so that when we are together it’s 20 times better.   

Positive above all positives. FaceTime ‘fun’ – is a necessity to keep your relationships from a distance alive, otherwise it will get boring waiting. We love it – it’s like we have a little code and we know when it’s going to happen. If I can get naked for him in front of the most unflattering camera known to man then I know our relationship is strong – I trust him more than life. As much as it isn’t the same as when we are in person – it does allow us to completely explore everything we want from one another so that when we are together it’s 20 times better.

I miss him everyday in a way I have never missed anyone before. I love counting down the days knowing I’m going to see him – we try to go 2 weeks max without seeing each other, which will get mighty expensive and tiresome but it’s worth every cent and every lost minute of sleep. You will never know how much you love and care about a person unless you’re not with them.

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Sean and Ola are in a long distance relationship - he lives in Melbourne; she lives in Sydney. Bicker constantly but they wouldn't have it any other way.

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