It’s one of the major defining moments in a relationship, or so history seems to say, moving in with your lover. Often considered the next progression in a partnership, living with your partner often takes the relationship from part time to full time. Deciding to take the plunge is bigger than just a spontaneous conversation that leads you into living in an undersized bedroom in a chaotic share house. Making the decision requires thought, consideration and a large amount of trust. So if you’re planning on taking the leap of faith, here are a couple of key components to consider.
There’s Little Room For Uncertainty
Be sure that you’re both 100% certain that moving in together is the right next step in your relationship. Don’t decide to do so if it’s merely for the purpose of reducing your rent costs. There are many more components than just the financial side of things. There needs to be a huge level of trust and maturity in your relationship. And even if someone is not fully sold on the idea, allow room for that uncertainty. The decision to make the move should just as much be an individual one.
Your Place, Their Place Or A New Place
An important decision to make is of course where you’ll live. Are you planning on finding a new place together; a share house or studio apartment? Or maybe your boy/girlfriend is planning on moving to your place? Whatever the situation be clear on what is important to you in a place. If you’re both bringing in an abundance of clothes, furniture and other miscellaneous items, do a clean out before the move is initiated.
Discuss Your Financial Situation
What’s mine in yours is definitely a saying that comes into real time practice when you decide to move in with your partner. Your expenses immediately become shared; rent, food, cleaning products, the Netflix account. Be sure to have an open and honest conversation before fully furnishing your new apartment about your daily expenses. If you’re harbouring some debt or a hefty student loan, let you partner know the details. Money is often one of the biggest deterrents in couples moving in together in the first place. Also remember; equal is not always fair. If you’re still studying full time and your significant other is raking in the full time bucks, costs will be divided differently. Think in percentages not in dollars.
Figure Out Your Schedules
Get an idea of each other’s daily routines. Do you shower in the morning or the evening? What time do you need to leave from work and what time will each other be home? What time does your partner like going to bed? Working out each other’s schedules will give you a better idea of how each others lives will fit together. It will also allow you to work out when you can schedule in some one on one time and also a little alone time too.
Communication Is Key
After the move is complete and all initial “moving in” duties are completed, be sure to keep the communication constant. There will be roadblocks and hurdles along the way, so be sure to share them and overcome them as a team. And remember, just because you’re roommates, it won’t always mean you have quality time together. Make the time, just like you did when you lived separately. The extra effort is sure to keep the spark alive, and don’t be scared to remind each other of it.
Whilst these need not be written on a piece of paper, stuck to the fridge and rewarded with gold stars, you should try to discuss basic cleaning rules and all that jazz. Just so you both share the responsibility. Are you going to wash your clothes together or separately? Who’s going to take on cooking duties, or will these be shared? Although you may have been dating each other for a while, you may not know how each other likes things done, so just check in with them and make a rough deal.
Image Sources: Unsplash, E! Online.