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We Ranked Every American Horror Story Season So Far And It’s A Bloody Feast

The eighth season of American Horror Story, titled ‘Apocalypse‘, was released at the backend 2018, and I thought, as we are nearing the double digits in seasons, it would only be apt to present our rankings (strongly created by just me tbh). Feel free to disagree, of course.

**MANY MANY SPOILER ALERTS**

#8 American Horror Story: Roanoke (2016)

What the season is about: A paranormal documentary series called ‘My Roanoke Nightmare’ takes up the first half of the season, which consists of a story following a married couple whose experiences are reenacted by actors. The Roanoke Colony’s infamous disappearance have spirits haunting a country house. The second half of the season is presented as found footage and depicts the aftermath in a series called ‘Return to Roanoke: Three Days in Hell’.

What I thought: In all fairness, I did stream this season from a dodgy website that I thankfully got no viruses from (that I’m aware of). I think that this season lacked in that it was too convoluted. I’m the first to appreciate meta when, of course, it is done well. It was just a little too much to follow the progress of the documentary series alongside the stories of the actors, alongside the paranormal overlap between the two with a follow up series.

Rotten Tomatoes rating: 76%

My rating: 4/10

#7 American Horror Story: Freak Show (2014-15)

What the season is about: The series follows a struggling freak show led by Elsa Mars (Jessica Lange, and her unfortunate final-ish appearance in AHS) whos ‘monsters’ have to overcome those who persecute them based on their looks.

What I thought: I think it was a great original idea. How often does any sort of art form ever produce a story to do with freak shows? But in all honesty, I think that it just got a little boring at times (and arguably, a lot to handle, especially when Angela Bassett’s character figured out she wasn’t a hermaphrodite, rather her penis is actually an enlarged clit…)

Rotten Tomatoes rating: 79%

My rating: 5.5/10

#6 American Horror Story: Coven (2013-14)

What it is about: The descendants of the witches who survived the Salem Witch Trials are subjected to voodoo practitioners and witch hunters.

What I thought: Again, another fantastically original idea, typical of the AHS creators. Jessica Lange, as always, Lily Rabe, Denis O’Hare and Jamie Brewer are phenomenal. Firstly, the character of Cordelia is highly irritating. I understand that she is trying to be this inspiring being in the young witches’ lives but honestly, she is just whiney. Secondly, Emma Roberts is a pretty poor actress, in my opinion. And thirdly, not enough Evan Peters screen time.

Rotten Tomatoes rating: 71%

My rating: 6/10

#5 American Horror Story: Hotel (2015-16)

What it is about: This season follows the strange ‘Hotel Cortez’ that houses the ghosts of various serial killers, vampires and other murder victims of the hotel. At the hotel, a detective investigates a series of murders based on the Ten Commandments.

What I thought: A very interesting story idea.I really liked how this season took a ‘sexy’ approach to horror. Lady Gaga impressed me in her first stint at acting. Evan Peters’ accent is on point. However, there were certain aspects of the show that had attempted to be crucial characters or plot points that, in the end, weren’t very memorable.

Rotten Tomatoes rating: 64%

My rating: 6.5/10

#4 American Horror Story: Apocalypse (2018)

What it is about: The Antichrist brings about the apocalypse by instigating nuclear warfare. The witches from Coven are summoned to defeat the Antichrist.

What I thought: A combination of Murder House and Coven in a post-apocalyptic setting stretched AHS’ strangeness to its furthest point in this series. But still, it was executed well, and it was highly entertaining. It was also (I think) the first time swearing is imbedded throughout the series, and that is always entertaining. Cody Fern, as a relatively fresh actor, does a pretty remarkable performance. I like also that it started close to the end of the story, and as it travelled further towards the end, it went back to the start. That was done really well.

Rotten Tomatoes rating: 71%

My rating: 7.5/10

#3 American Horror Story: Asylum (2012-13)

What it is about: This season follows the patients and staff members of the church owned asylum housing the criminally insane. The inhabitants are routinely subject to supernatural and scientific influences including demonic possession and extraterrestrial abduction.

What I thought: Probably the best story idea out of all the AHS seasons so far. Anything about an asylum will almost always grab any audience’s interest and it was executed very well. The Boston accents are always a fantastic touch. There was not one actor/actress that did anything close to a poor job.

Rotten Tomatoes rating: 84%

My rating: 8/10

#2 American Horror Story: Murder House (2011)

What it is about: A family moves cities to a restored mansion that is haunted by the ghosts of anyone who has ever died on the property. Flashbacks depict the mansion’s previous homeowners throughout the last century, dating back to its construction in the 1920’s.

What I thought: I never ever once got bored in any scene of any episode of this season. If I was to return to a season in need of an AHS fix that isn’t too heavy or too intense, I would return to this one. A haunted mansion story is obviously not the most original idea for a story and therefore, it can easily not be done well, but this one most definitely is done very well.

Rotten Tomatoes rating: 73%

My rating: 9/10

#1 American Horror Story: Cult (2017)

What it is about: A fictional town is left divided upon the wake of Donald Trump’s election as president. A local restaurant owner is left distraught as her phobias and anxiety are triggered, whilst a misogynistic alt-righter rejoices and pursues political power.

What I thought: This season touches on such a prevalent and eery issue in our modern world. It is the best example that, I feel, a piece of fiction can do to show the extremities with something as normal and every day as politics. Evan Peters is a very talented actor and his abilities are very clearly shown in this series. Sarah Paulson’s character is so important in showing the reactions towards the anxieties and phobias of the world for an every day person.

Rotten Tomatoes rating: 73%

My rating: 10/10

In terms of a TV critic, I am certainly no Rotten Tomatoes boujee wine-sipper so don’t even @ me. Ultimately, I think this show is remarkable in all aspects, and I’m very happy that they are renewing for two more seasons!

Image Source: Netflix and Foxtel Now

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